Category: Uncategorized
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i
had a whole birthday where i hosted an art show with all of my doodles i had been working on and all of my family and friends came and it was honestly such a beautiful day where i felt so much love as my whole family just whipped up the most perfect birthday i could…
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i
feel as if i have been a hermit, a recluse. like i have lost all of my backbone. and the injustices and the racism make me sick with rage with a desperate hopelessness in my frantic struggle in HOW DO WE MAKE THIS STOP and it’s on a repeat loop in my head and of course it’s…
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i
have been drawing more and more and i don’t know if it’s me procrastinating so i don’t have to worry about writing or if it’s me becoming obsessed with my dad’s point of view. i wrote some variation of this on my substack. i have been using oil pastels and recreating images like my dad used…
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hi
i’ve been absent. i took a good turn and i used up my good turn to just be present and maybe i got carried away. maybe i did too much because at one point i came crashing down and it hurt and there was a lot of fear. it’s scary when the grief hits you.…
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i
rarely wear mascara now just in case i cry and a lot just feels sad. especially holidays and birthdays and anniversaries. and it’s not a complaint, it’s just a fact of mine that i’m learning to live with and the fact that this sadness may very well be with me for the rest of my life. a…
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i
have been resting and taking breaks and asking questions and attempting to unravel everything within me so that i can hopefully put it all back together into some kind of version of me that is so positive and uplifting that she can remember that with enough positive and goodness, good will always win. and while…
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what
the actual fuck has been on repeat in my head the past week. it eventually turned into everything has a direct result but there’s still some intermittent what the fucks and they’ll probably stay if i’m honest. i had to have a hard pause after that heartbreaking result that will have direct results in itself.…
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hi
it’s me on a sunday writing as i promised myself. this was a sad week and a bit heavy but you know i am just reminding myself that it’s only been 7 months and his birthday is coming up and these things are just heavy. it all started with a break down at costco. we…
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okay
so it is monday and i started this post two thursdays ago and edited on last week’s saturday and have held onto it over the weekend and am now posting on a monday. so the days are everywhere because this is one of the deep, vulnerable ones. you know the ones that i started this…
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hi
it’s saturday. i have drank too much and now have a saturday with repercussions that i have to force myself to be kind to myself and remind myself that it is saturday and there is a chance for redemption. i enjoy drinking but just seem to have returned to a bit of an overdoing state…
soliloquies in written form 